September 16, 2023
I had a restless sad night. I had been choosing to feel victimized by life since I arrived back in Texas August 20th after a 3 1/2 week vacation in Idaho. My homeland, it’s where I lived for 42 years of my life. It was a delightful vacation in Idaho, playing in the mountains and rivers, visiting family (which I have an abundance of there). The weather was heavenly. In the valley, the smell of the mint fields filled the air. The mountains smelled of pine. The crystal clear creeks flowed ice cold over colorful river rocks. It was home and I wanted to stay. Upon arriving back in Texas I was greeted with a drought and triple digit heat. I immediately jumped back into work and my Texas life. It was good to see my husband and be home but I longed to be back in Idaho.
I got up and started some water for tea. I was staying at a cabin with my friend Sarah. It is her boyfriends cabin in hill country. He is fixing it up to rent out on Airbnb. He’s done a great job so far, it’s beautiful inside with a deck outside and a lovely view of the countryside. I drank my tea and moped around for a while in the morning. I told Sarah what was going on in my thought world. I had not been talking to anyone about how I was feeling. I knew it was inner work that I had the answers for within me. I prayed asking for clarity. After talking to Sarah and texting with a couple of friends, I felt the depression lifting and joy returned. The weather had cooled off and it was raining. The land was refreshed and so was I. I decided that I can easily live in both Texas and Idaho. I can stay all summer in Idaho and enjoy Texas the rest of the year. It felt perfect and flowing.
Sarah and I had a great day. We went on a walk around the 12 acres of land the cabin is on. I took pictures of plants and identified them on iNaturalist. There were a few plants I had not seen before and I was excited to do some research on them to see if the were edible or medicinal in any way. We talked and ate lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. I did some yoga on the deck. It felt good to feel good and spend time with one of my amazing friends.
That evening we attempted to start a fire and everything was too damp. We went inside and talked a while before going to sleep. It was a wonderful day and I am grateful for it.